Hard to breathe

Why do parents expect such things from their children which they’re incapable of doing? Constantly I’m facing such conditions and having persistent arguments with my parents about MY career choices. Every now and then I’m forced to ponder over my decisions whether I’m really taking the right path or should I just give in to what my parents have in mind for me.

I hate to fight with my dad. I hate it. ย I hate to break his heart with every word that I speak to him. Why am I such a horrible daughter!! Why couldn’t I just do what he wished for !ย ย I am so scared for my future and I need his support at this point but instead of this my parents have chosen to give me a hard time. I know their intentions are not bad but why can’t for just one time they try to understand.

I feel sick all the time these days. There’s so much in my mind that is going on and I can’t even vent out my feelings to anyone. There’s no one who would get me. I feel so alone,sick and scared all the time. There is so much I want to say but not able to find just the right words. I am withering away with each passing day. Don’t know if I will be left with the right amount of energy to fulfill my parent’s dreams. God please guide my way.

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A letter to the Princess (my BFFs)

I am sorry. I know I’m breaking your hearts away. I might have hurt you too in the process but seriously it is time for me to get away from all of you. You don’t want me to do that but I just want to say it is the best thing we can do to each other and I can do to myself. It has been a hard decision but it is going to become the bitter reality of our lives. I will have to go on my way.

And while writing this letter, I’m reminded of all the sweet memories of our reunions,our sleepovers and our nonsense chats. It has been a pleasure growing up with you all. I always thought we were destined to be together and that we could not have land up with better persons in our lives apart from each other. But as a grown up woman now, I find these statements silly and baseless. The thing which tied us together for so long was only the time factor. We’re just like an old married couple,that too an arranged one, who have spent so much time together that it seems pointless to them to walk out of their marriage. But unfortunately I need to walk out girls, I need a divorce from you guys ! I am not asking for any alimony but just one thing try to find someone good in your lives who would understand you completely inside out,if you can do that for me, so that you never have to find yourself with a gaping hole in your hearts.

Take care all of you. I never thought I would be the one doing this to us but then life presents us with the most unfortunate situations at the most unfortunate times.

PS: I’m gonna read my diary whenever I miss you all ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

The power of words

We have been taught from our childhood days to think before you speak. Always measure your words before blurting them out and check that no one gets hurt with whatever you say. As children we obeyed these rules by heart but by the time we are old enough to rule the world we forget these simple mannerisms which makes us who we are- a human being. I read someone’s status a few days ago which said “MANNERS MAKETH MAN”. Unfortunately we have come to an age where people literally crush people around them under their feet in order to move forward in their supposedly better lives. They just simply don’t care whether they’re breaking someone’s heart,sabotaging someone’s image,self respect or just making them look like a clown in front of the whole world. The sufferer is left with a scar for the rest of his life. Read more

Reality is a bitter gourd and you have to swallow it

Why does something bad has to happen when you’re enjoying the most beautiful period of your life ?
Does it have any relation with your past karma ?
Everytime I have to face the same thing in one way or the other. And now I wonder why? Should i stop doing it? Or should I just accept the bitter reality?
Life is all about coming to the terms with what is being given to you by god and the funny fact is you cannot even challenge it because you don’t even know who the hell is he? why is he doing that you?
I was always a staunch believer of “whatever happens,happens for the best”. But is it really the case ? I look around me and see misery,poverty,destruction,terrorism. Is it really happening for the good ?
However tiny my problem might be,it is big enough for me to cry about it and I have all the right to ask that almighty, if there is, Is this what you have for me ? Did i do something so terribly wrong that I’m being punished in this way ? If you’re there and hearing me out I would like to tell you that I will not lose my faith in one thing no matter whatever problems you create for me but yes it might happen that I may lose my faith in you and forget that you’re even there for us.

Better late than never !

It has been so many days that I took up my pen & paper to write up something but today I finally had an urge to put down everything and be free of the guilt of not keeping up to my habit of writing ๐Ÿ˜›

In the past few days I’ve come across so many new people in my life and each of them left a different impression on me. It makes me smile when I ponder over the fact that how quickly I am able to talk with unknown people without giving it a thought even once what other person might be thinking of me. Gone are the days when I used to care about what others think of me rather what I think of myself. Read more

Farewell preparaciรณn

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Feel beautiful and that’s all matters

As my graduation day is approaching iย am feeling a little nauseated to think of the fact that i am a big grownup now and i have so many responsibilities to bear. Apart from this it is so sad to even think about leaving the college,friends,all the fun and masti that i’ve been doing here. In Fact nowadays a thought is coming into my mind that i can spend another two years in my dorm room,i love the way it is-small,comfy and cosy little bed occupied mostly by “Beary”(my teddy bear ๐Ÿ™‚ ). Oh!! I am gonna miss this forever… Read more