Lost

What do you do when you commit a terrible mistake, a mistake that can’t be undone ? When your hands start to fumble, eyes carry tears but you’re not able to cry, when you know you’ve lost something which mattered, when you feel like your world has crashed in a matter of seconds.

You realize what you did, you realize the might of words. They either make or break someone. And if people break, they break relationships as well. You wish you could take back all, you wish you hadn’t said anything at all. But it’s too late for that now. Everything has turned into ashes and left you with a burning pain in your heart. No one will ever know, neither the person you’ve lost nor the rest of the world. It’s you who did it, it’s you who lost him, it’s you who will bear the pain for the rest of your life. The person you wished to preserve all your life is nowhere to be seen now.

How does it feel to be not liked ? Much better than to be rejected. How does it feel to be insulted ? Yes insulted. He never expected you to insult him. Why did you do it anyway ?

What ? You never intended to ?

But you did it anyway ?

See that’s what I said. Words. Watch your words, better taste them before you let them leave your tongue’s paradise. You said it yourself, how can you forget what you believed in ?

So you didn’t mean what you said in the way you said it ? but it did mean that way. The offense was taken and hence was acted upon. You could do nothing.

You started to believe him, you wanted to learn from him, you finally wanted to believe in god because of him. Why did you do it ? Why did you hurt the only person who selflessly made you so happy ?

 I wish if only there was a way to take back what you said, to undo what you did. Alas! he’s gone. If only he knew that you never wanted to do what you did. If only he knew that you will never be the same again. You made a mistake. Mistakes happen. I thought the one who forgives is the one who knows that god forgives too.

Take a lesson and wish him goodbye if he never wants to come back. It’s his life, his decision. Improve yourself. Maybe he will be happy to see you changed for good. That’s the only way to redeem yourself of your deeds.

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A week to remember- Part I

I remember the day when I was standing at the boarding gate, waving goodbye to my parents. They were so excited that day more than I was, especially my dad. And why wouldn’t he be? I was going to travel by flight for the very first time in my life. Moreover, I was and still am the only member of the whole extended family to board a flight. My dad was so super excited that he couldn’t keep it to himself and much to my resistance he spilled the beans to everyone in the family. He wanted to share his happiness with everyone I suppose, although I felt a little embarrassed by this. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Travelling by flight is considered,mostly, a luxury in India, especially in the middle-class families like mine.

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What am I left with ?

I have learned from my experience that negativity drains you out and so does the presence of negative people around you. Sometimes we are disillusioned by the negative souls, mistaking them to be ever positive and the constant source of power in our lives. We blindly make them the sun of our universe. However, it so happens that the very bright and positively energized soul we believed in turns out to be a dark horrifying black hole masquerading all the while to be perfect and pure, swallowing all your energy & spark in return.

What are we left with then ? A demented mind and a wrecked soul.

It leaves you to suffer on your own, expect you to be wise and strong for such future battles. I don’t see a point where you let others die on the pretense of making things better for them. I believe in compassion, I believe in words, sacrifice, and promises, I believe in going out of my way to do what I believe in, and not letting anyone cry because of me.

Unfortunately, black holes don’t feel the same. They love to suck everything that’s best in you, devoid you of all that you’re made of. They creep back into your lives every now and then, justify their decisions, make you believe what they did was rightfully their duty towards you. Tactfully, they will sway you again. They will try to rape what you’ve rebuilt so far, your gleaming soul, and take away every ounce of it. You will never get it back. Never. Your light will scream your name but black hole will dissolve it inside, leaving you flayed AGAIN.

Don’t be a coward, they die

Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time
-Maya Angelou

Only cowards forget, brave ones live with the memories and choose to cherish them forever. You don’t forget someone when you’ve loved him from whole of your heart, especially then.
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Just love and nothing more…

Love is such a magical feeling and we all at some point in our lives have come across the time when we had this magical feeling in our hearts,tummy and everywhere else in our body. Then why do we try to forget our love if the relationship turns out bad or why do we stop ourselves from loving someone else only because we have already been in love once ?
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Enter Chills !!!

With December almost approaching, the winters here in Dehradun are taking a surprising turn. From the past few weeks it was not so cold but last night it rained and temperature dipped drastically. Well I have been away from my blog from more than a month now courtesy my bad ISP in addition to Diwali holidays and my exams. I really didn’t get any time to write anything.

There is one more cute reason which/who is taking most of my free time and she is my cutie pie “Maaauu”. She came to us one cold night around two weeks backs and she’s the cutest pet I’ve ever had ! Although I was never a cat lover instead was and still am a die hard dog lover but she instantly made me fall for her !!

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Maaauu :* :* 

She takes our hearts away each day with her mischievous activities and sleeps like a queen on my blanket.
As it is my birthday in not less than 10 days, I feel like she’s perfect gift for me this year 🙂

Goodnight Wishes from her 🙂